Thirsty for Truth
“If you listen to your body when it whispers, you won’t have to hear it scream”
-unknown
Last year, I gained 20lbs literally overnight.
I had also become insulin resistant, and my cortisol levels were thru the roof.
My hair was falling out in clumps.
I remember putting my jeans on and they wouldn’t even go past my tights.
I couldn’t understand! How is could this be possible?
I am the healthiest person that I know!
As you know, I eat the healthiest and freshest food. I cleanse and detoxify my body on a regular basis, I exercise, I get sunshine, sauna, Etc.
So, what was happening?
There were so much shame and frustration that came with my newly acquired chub.
I couldn’t believe that I was, overweight!
Had I been overeating, or started eating lots of processed foods or stuffing my face with bon bons… I would understand why the weight gain.
But no!
NO ‘apparent reason” just my little body holding on to fat for dear life.
Self-doubt crept in. Were my practices wrong? Was what I had done to ‘help’ my body, hurt my body? why were my practices working for my clients and not me?
I couldn’t pinpoint it. But there was one thing I was certain about.
I knew my body was trying to talk to me. And at this point it was desperate; I know I’d gone into full protection mode.
Bodies of research prove the undeniably direct connection between stress and disease and/or body conditions.
When the body holds on to fat, its PROTECTING ITSELF FROM SOMETHING(toxins, emotional abuse, etc) in your environment.
There was so much change happening in my life at that time.
I kept threading forward and didn’t take the time to listen to what my body was trying to tell me.
I continued to do the same things I’ve always done. Eat predominantly live foods, exercise, breath work, massage, sauna, etc.
But the weight was not budging.
After months of my weight not budging, not even an ounce, I tried other methods.
I went as far as to listen to the main media doctors that tell you to shove protein down your throats.
I started to eat more protein.
I found myself consistently bloated and very uncomfortable. I even got constipated!
I became more swollen and inflamed.
I went to the doctor and was immediately boxed in to the menopause narrative.
They said: its probably menopause! (MORE ON THIS ON ANOTHER NEWSLETTER)
mmm… ?
If it was menopause, then every single woman going through menopause out there would be fat.
I had to get to the root of my issue. I had to look at my own body, as the unique mechanism and ecosystem that it is.
The more protein I ate, the more I exercised more, the heavier weights I lifted; the more inflamed I became.
UGH!
I was even walking 10k steps per day!
My thyroid begun to slow down,
And as time passed, I felt worse! And got fatter.
How could this be!
The weight wouldn’t budge and now I had full body aches and pain. My hips and right shoulder were constantly aching and was having difficulty sleeping.
In my desperate search to fix my problem; I was doing tons of research and listening to all health podcasts.
And this is when I heard the magic words by a random stranger.
“You must strip yourself down to nothing, to figure out who you really are”
His words resonated deeply! So, I decided it’s time to strip down!
I did what any reasonable person would do: I removed it all… I closed shop.
I realized every cell, organ, and system in my body needed a break.
I dry fasted (NO FOOD & NO WATER) for 3 days straight, to give my spirit time and space to re-emerge. And trusted that the wisdom of my body would take over and heal me.
I rested, slept, and wept almost the entire time.
I gave myself all the space I needed.
This is when clarity arrived, like the queen she is.
My body had been reacting to covert emotional toxicity!
I started to pay close attention to what in my environment could be hurting me. With hawk like precision, I watched every single one of my relationships.
I became conscious of all my dynamics with people, money, things, thoughts and even my words.
How do I feel when I am around certain people, places or things.
How do I feel about my work? Have I allowed myself to expand and grow?
I am following the calls of my heart?
What fears were holding me back?
Who needs to leave my life? Whose life do I need to leave?
Have I been fighting losing battles? Where in my life I am doing too much selling, too much convincing?
Where am I trying too fucking hard?
I am working too hard, not enough, and for what?
Where have I been the victim, and where I am the perpetrator?
Which dry tit have I’ve been trying to milk love, satisfaction or connection from?
Are my deepest womanly needs being met?
Where, am I allowing myself to rot and die?
What areas of my life have I been neglecting?
My body was telling me so much! And I had forgotten how to listen.
So, I quit! I quit all my addictions; I quit all the relationships that weren’t serving me or where I wasn’t serving them. I even quit subscriptions that I wasn’t using.
I stopped learning from people whose voices and attitudes clammed me up.
I threw in the towel on the things I had been doing for years that were bringing shit results.
I stopped comparing myself to others.
I released the need to be someone that I didn’t want to be.
I let go of the need to know why things happen as they do.
I am now in the process of sorting thru what’s little left of my physical belongings and making space to start writing the next chapter of my life.
I eat when I am hungry, I sleep when I am tired and I listen when my body talks.
I don’t engage is surface level conversations and tell the truth about my feelings.
I don’t make promises I can’t or don’t want to keep.
And most importantly, I no longer try to fill the space with my words.
But when I have things to say… I say them, confidently and without regrets.
I stop and breath each time I consume… anything! and ask my body how it feels.
During the fast I remembered that silence is where the answers to our most important questions are found.
Emotional toxicity can take many forms and its corrosive to your body, mind and spirit.
But your body is always giving you signs and cues.
If your body is “acting up”, it’s more likely that is in a reactive state to an external threat.
These threats aren’t always loud or visible.
But quiet, subtle and insidious.
Your body is always on the lookout, regardless of how subtle the abuse, your body will notice.
Your job is to tune in and listen and trust in your body’s innate wisdom and signals to recognize the truth.
These signals don’t automatically mean a relationship or environment is toxic, but patterns that repeat consistently around certain people or situations can be meaningful. Often the body notices chronic emotional stress before the mind fully names it.
Some of the most common body and behavior signals linked to subtle emotional toxicity include:
Constant tension or hyper vigilance.
Feeling “on edge” around certain people
Tight chest or shallow breathing
Jaw clenching or teeth grinding
Frequent headaches or neck pain
Digestive issues or appetite changes and weight gain/loss
Trouble sleeping or waking anxious
Unexplained fatigue after interactions
Brain fog or poor concentration
Emotional numbness or shutdown
Irritability that feels unlike you
Over-explaining yourself constantly
People-pleasing to avoid conflict
Walking on eggshells
Second-guessing your own memory or instincts
Feeling smaller, quieter, or less confident around someone or situations.
Losing motivation for hobbies or social connection
Relief when someone leaves, cancels, or stops texting
Feeling guilty for having normal needs or boundaries
Difficulty relaxing even in safe environments
Sudden mood drops before seeing certain people or doing certain activites.
Feeling emotionally drained instead of supported after conversations
Holding back honesty out of fear of reactions
Becoming unusually apologetic
Feeling disconnected from your own personality or identity
A useful pattern to watch for is this: your body often relaxes when emotional safety is present, and tightens when it anticipates emotional harm — even subtle harm like criticism, unpredictability, manipulation, passive aggression, or chronic invalidation.
Fast forward a few months later; I am happy to announce that my thyroid is functioning normally, I am no longer insulin resistant and I’ve released 12 lbs body armor.
If you’re struggling with anything similar, lets talk.
Knowing how to listen to your body is the beginning of a wonderful adventure. And you don't have to do it alone.
Much love,
Gabriela